What is the definition of value? Some might say that something valuable has a high price tag, but others might say that something valuable is something that brings great enjoyment or happiness. However you define it, you probably have things that you value, as do I. I value a run on a cool fall morning, and I also value my Diadora LX soccer cleats.
My alarm sounds, and the hard rock of Ozzy Osborne singing “I Don’t Wanna Stop” fills my ears. I lay there in bed for a few minutes, just relaxing, staring at the ceiling. Once the song ends, I let out a sigh and slowly rise from my bed. I slip on my socks, shorts, shirt, and shoes. My black Under Armour covers my arms, and my thin gloves cover my hands. I walk in to the kitchen where the first glints of morning sun shower everything with a warm light. I scribble a note on a piece of scrap paper telling my parents that I will be back shortly, and I walk out the door. The brisk air of the early morning fall touches my skin, sending a chill reverberating throughout my body. I start out with a slow jog, building up my pace until I am warm. I stay at that pace for a good two miles and then sprint the last one hundred meters. I stretch out my tight muscles, and then begin to head home. This time I keep a smooth, consistent pace, and exhale every time my left foot touches the ground to prevent cramps. With each breath, I feel the cool air flow into my lungs, and then out again.
I open the gray cardboard box, and inside are the most amazing things I’ve ever seen. My new, pearly white Diadora LX cleats look amazing. I slowly and carefully remove them from the box. With deliberate motions, I spin them around, admiring every detail, from the blue spikes to the hand stitched seams. I put them on and tie the laces. Since they are so long, I have to wrap the laces around the bottom once before tying them. Once both shoes are tight on my feet, I grab a ball and rush outside. When I step on the grass, I look down and all that I can see is light. Blinding light, redirected from the sun off of my cleats, and into my eyes. I find the ball, and flick it in the air. I begin to juggle, alternating feet. The kangaroo leather holds very well.
Both taking a long run on a cold morning, and my soccer cleats are things that I value. One is a material possession, while the other is not. My run on a cold morning a critical part of my day. It wakes me up after a long nights sleep, refreshes me, and starts off my weekend on a positive note. While running, I am able to think very clearly. It is almost as if the cool air brushing against my face takes all the cluttered thoughts in my head and organizes them for me. Thanks to these runs, I have been able to come to many good decisions. My cleats allow me to play my favorite sport successfully. Without them, I would be slipping all over the field, and would be a very ineffective player. They cost me $90, which is not a lot of money compared to some things, but for cleats that is a fairly expensive price.
My morning run and my cleats both represent a part of my identity. My cleats represent my love for soccer and sports, and my run signifies my pride in being in shape, and the enjoyment I get in having some time to myself.I can honestly say that I would be lost without either of these things, and to me, they are both truly valuable.
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8 comments:
hey dont make fun of my name
Jack’s value essay was amazing. (Good Job Jack!) Jack starts off his essay with a very confident answer to what he believes makes something valuable. Jack shares with his readers that people can value both something of price, and something without. Jack most strongly values a run on a cool fall morning, and his Diadora LX soccer cleats.
Overall I think Jack’s essay was exquisitely written. It was well thought out, and gave a lot of detail. (Which I love.) However, I feel that Jack got more into depth when he was describing his run on a cool fall morning. I had a clear picture of him and his surroundings. A part that stood out to me was when Jack wrote, “I walk into the kitchen where the first glints of morning sun shower everything with a warm light.” This one sentence stood out to me because of Jack’s unique word choice.
I think this essay was marvelous. Jack added as much detail as possible without over doing it. I think his biggest strength was his word choice in describing his morning run. That paragraph seemed flawless.
One piece of advice that I would give to Jack would be adding a little more detail about your cleats. Overall, that paragraph is great, but from reading your first paragraph into your second it seems like something is missing. Don’t change anything, just improve! I think that Mr. B-G will enjoy this piece
1. I think that the author thinks that things are valuable in different ways to different people. The author values his cleats in financial worth. Also the author values his morning runs in the fall as something that brings him great joy and happiness. He values these things in different ways.
2. I feel that jacks morning run was best described. I feel this way because he used very good description on how far he went and what he did while running. “I start out with a slow jog, building up my pace until I am warm.” I picked this quote because it showed how jack described how much he ran at a certain pace, until he changed his pace.
3. I feel that this essays overall strength, would be word choice. I feel this way because jack worded things so they flowed and sounded correct. His sentences led into each other and it made the essay easily readable. It also made the essay very understandable and clear.
4. Consider adding a little more detail about you cleats and check your grammar and spelling before Mr. BG checks it. Overall you did a very good job on your essay with making the sentences flow, and using good vocabulary.
That was a very good essay jack, good job. I could totally understand what you were saying. you were talking about how your early morning run and your soccer cleats are very dear and valuable to you.
The one value that i thought was the most clearly described was your early morning run. you described it with so much detail that it made me feel that i was watching you run from up above somewhere.
I think that your best strength throughout your intire essay was your organization. the whole essay was on topic, it never strayed from the point or anything.
I think that the one thing that you could inprove on is adding a little more a bout your cleats. like how do you feel when you wear them or something. But overall it was very good.
I thought that this was a great essay Jack. In the intro, Jack said that value can be something with a high price or it can be something that has a lot of sentamental value to you too. Jack values his Diadora LX soccer cleats and morning runs in the fall.
I felt that Jack's description of a run in the fall was developed. I think that he put a lot of effort and detail into this particular part of the story. I liked how he said that he starts to run faster after he has gotten warmed up because I can relate to that as well. The discription of that part of the story made me fel like I was there.
I think that one of the strengths in Jack's story was word choice. He used outstanding words in his story instead of boring over used words. T he great words in the story made it sound good and made me want to read more. I think that was a strong part of Jack's essay.
I think that maybe you could try to describe more of your cleats. I found some small errors in that part of the story as well. I thought that the story was well described and very good other than that.
Jack, this is a really good essay and I like the way it was written. You question the meaning of value well and you made it your first sentence which lets the reader know right away what you will be talking about. You also make your introduction clear on how you value
both your soccer cleats and your morning runs.
The priceless moment of your early morning runs stood out to me the most. My favorite part was when you said,"The brisk air of the early morning fall touches my skin, sending a chill reverberating throughout my body. I start out with a slow jog, building up my pace until I am warm" and it gave me a really vivid picture.
In my opinion I think that you're whole essay is very strong and I like the way that it is organized because it makes it easier to read and more understandable. The way you used descriptive in your sentences such as, “Blinding light, redirected from the sun off of my cleats, and into my eyes” was another strong part of your essay.
I think one helpful suggestion that I could give you would be to have a conclusion that defines your value of meaning and what you consider valuable and what you don’t consider valuable.
Jack thinks that value and what you think of it depends on your personality. Such as someone who is into money would prefer a material value while someone on the opposite side would prefer a more sentimental value. Jack values two important things to his life. The first being a run on a cool fall morning and the other being his Diadora LX soccer cleats.
The better described of the two items in Jack’s essay must be the Diadora cleats. He takes you into the moment of his excitement of receiving them. He then proceeds to explain his first use of them. This was in his yard juggling a soccerball. His detail is great and his vocabulary is quite expansive.
One strong point in this essay is the description of the cleats. He makes sure the reader knows his joy in getting them. He also makes sure the reader can feel the kangaroo leather as he kicks the ball between his feet. The paragraph is very well written.
One suggestion I would make to improve this essay would be to expand on the conclusion. It just seems too brief as it is. It has all the needed requirements but needs to end slower. Now the essay ends too abruptly.
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